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toast is like 6 and she still chases her tail

i figured out how to enable motion controls for my switch pro controller on steam for halo infinite and it was like that part in ratatouille where the critic remembers his childhood

i dont like that steam support signs their emails with cheers. like i mean it's fine i guess but i immediately just attribute a bri'ish accent to anyone doing that. so, i guess i gotta read all steam support emails as such now.

<elle> boosted

halo infinite 

when you watch 3 or 4 of your teammates dancing around an enemy on a ghost you realize that there's a ton of new people that have never played halo that weren't taught you can hijack vehicles in halo extremely easily so long as you're next to them because the game doesn't teach you anything but basic combat, no vehicle combat or at least enemies in vehicles that may lead to you learning this

<elle> boosted

how to determine if a drawing of an unfamiliar character is or is not hatsune miku 

step 1: do they have teal hair?

step 2: they are hatsune miku

modding halo infinite to replace every multikill voiceline so Jeff the halo announcer is yelling trans rights as i execute all the gamers

youtu.be/R-plZUgmA64

<elle> boosted

yes of course i go outside! every once in awhile women need to go outside and stare at the moon to sedate their hysteria. everyone knows this.

cheetahs are so similar because they went through such a bad genetic bottleneck at one point that they required parent-child and brother-sister mating to survive.

outside of greatly limiting their gene pool, it gave them not simply recessive mental health issues, but consistent, persistent anxiety throughout all of them.

imagine being alive only because your extremely anxious ancestor fucked their child during the last depression or whatever.

god damb cheetahs are somethin'.

gotta love 'em.

they are hiding the queen's death because they want her luscious meat and bones all to themselves.

youtubers need to coordinate better so they don't all talk about the same rando horrible person each week so i dont then feel like im having the worst deja vu.

<elle> boosted

all the corners cut for the recent gta remaster really are providing a slew of hilarious issues and glitches. for instance, I'd love to know what causes the player's vehicle to be squashed, stretched and flattened to the point where the vehicle's wheels can't function properly

getting older means you cant eat raw garlic as a snack as easily anymore

but is it better than a false scrotum? who can say.

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this is funny because it sounds like a shitpost but isn't whatsoever

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ah yes, the lying doggo method of covert operations. place the individual under a sleeping dog costume.

revolutionizing the medical world by using pure isopropyl alcohol as bong water and becoming invincible.

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corpus

gui of elle.iso database corpus. prone to failures and glitches.